Hey Zengarmy,

(Psst! I hope you've noticed the snowfall effect added to the blog!

Sadly it's only visible on PC so please read this on your PC hahah!)

Just checking in to inform you that I'm NOT DEAD YET, hahah!
Sorry for the lack of update but I hardly had any time to blog.
I CANNOT believe 2016 is almost ending! Like. What. The. Fuck?
I can still remember starting off this year hoping that it'll be more
smooth-sailing than all of my previous years (I have a pretty shitty
luck in my life in general, trust me) but now here I am, sitting down
typing this blog post thinking how unbelievably fast 2016 has flew by.

Okay, just so you know, this blog post is probably going to be me babbling
aimlessly because I have so many random thoughts in my mind desperately
oozing out of my brain (I hate the word oozing it tickles me!) but I have so
little time to construct all of my thoughts into bite-size sentences, so yeah.
I'm currently in the terminal stage of my semester and this is literally me :

Not enough sleep. Not enough sleep. And not enough sleep. Hahahah!
( People who think university life is fun need to rethink their lives. )

Let's talk about : Perspective.

I came across this quote on Tumblr the other day and thought it was brilliant!
If you haven't read my previous post yet, I briefly mentioned about my laptop
malfunction and how I had an anxiety attack for that. I used to believe that I'm
an independent person who can live without my laptop, but it was only up until
the point when my laptop broke down that I start to realize: NO WAY. I CANNOT
live without my laptop, EVER! For those of you who think I'm a whining weirdo
because duh I can still surf the Internet using my smartphone, yes you're right.
I'm that guy who prefers carrying a heavy-ass laptop around, because I'm weird.
As an online creator myself, I'm SO dependent on my laptop — that I'll instantly
feel anxious once my laptop is not with me  when in fact it's NOT the end of the
world! I can still jot down ideas on my journal! (even though less efficient, haha)
I believe people who suffer from anxiety will understand my point. Your brain has
somehow managed to trick you into amplifying the most stupid little things into
catastrophic life events that will destroy your past, present & future. Everything!

Things are what you make of them. With my anxiety, I can pretty much relate
to this on a daily basis. In my case, I over-imagine and overthink stuffs far too
often (and easily) than other people do. Here are 2 great YouTube videos from
Zannah and Savannah (omg their names rhymed, I didn't plan that haha) that
I think described my situation very well. Please do have a watch if you're free.

One of the easiest ways to trigger anxiety is by constantly thinking of "what if".
And believe me, persuading a person with anxiety to stop thinking about "what if"
is easier said than done. "What if I said this and everyone HATES me?" "WHAT IF?!"
"What if I avoided THAT? Then THIS wouldn't happen!"

▲ Inside the mind of an anxiety sufferer.

It's very easy for people to say "oh come on just get over it" or
"stop wallowing in your self-pity party", but the truth is, anxiety
sufferers couldn't switch off the "what if" button as easily as others.
I'm glad to say that I've been doing quite a good job with controlling
my anxiety lately, and there are no magic tricks behind it other than
surrounding yourself with positive people & friends who will lift you up.
Knowing how to cut out toxic relationships had seriously helped a lot with
reducing my anxiety. Remember, sometimes it's okay to put yourself first.

You will be enough.

PS : literally spent only 30 minutes to finish writing this post

so sorry if it's not a very organised blog post (I warned you).
Regular posts will resume after I've finished my freaking finals.



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